The One With The Wedding | Part 20
My Big Fat Jewish Wedding, Take III!
This is Part 20 of a series. For a recap, click here.
“Jesus Christ Jess, when does something good happen? Your blog on Sundays makes me depressed!” lamented a friend. He’s right. So, here’s a fun one:
I finally got married!
If you recall, my Big Fat Jewish Wedding was cancelled, once in April 2020, and again in August 2021, with four weeks notice and loads of other life events before, during and after.
Feeling down about other aspects of our lives - baby, career - we thought, you know what? Covid is essentially background now. Let’s do it. Let’s have the wedding, finally! How hard can it be to re-plan in a few months?
Narrator: Very hard. So very, very hard.
For one, our caterer had packed up shop and had no intention on returning for a One Time Special, like Rihanna at a billionaire oil tycoon’s 47th birthday party.
The cinema we wanted to host in originally cost $2,000. In 2024, they decided to add another zero (!)
I no longer liked my dress from 2019, the hall for the reception was booked, dates were booking out because everyone and their mother seemed to be getting married in 2024, I had no idea who to now get for hair and make-up, the bus company had gone into administration, we had threatened our former photographer with VCAT action after running off with our funds and I’d now have to DIY all the décor.
But like… the band was still booked?
I relished in complaining about my fabulous first-world problems, and took over 110% of the planning, chastising my partner for not being more involved, but being equally (if not even more) horrified when he dared express any kind of opinion for My “Our” Big Day.
Overall though, aside from my dad no longer being with us, The Wedding: Take III was better in every way.
We had friends and family fly in from Singapore, the UK, the USA, and even those who crossed the river from the north. I cherished having some of my closest friends here for the occasion and took them to see all the sights (like the Brighton beach boxes when it was hailing, or getting terribly sunburnt during an eagle show at Healesville Sanctuary. Creating memories everywhere!)
We had new venues, a new caterer, a great wedding coordinator, cool disco décor, awesome lighting, I’d lost weight and altered my dress in a way I loved, and it looked like our dog Maple was going to make the ceremony!
What we also hadn’t told anyone, is that after the sadness of the embryo transfer not taking in January (alongside the news of Maple being terminal), is that the second transfer WAS successful. And the week of the wedding, we were around 10 weeks. We were beyond excited and couldn’t wait to share in a few weeks’ time that we were going to become parents for real. We had already looked into leave and our flights to Colombia, so booked a shorter trip to the Gold Coast after the wedding instead.
We stayed apart the night before the wedding in anticipation. The morning of, after doing some calming meditation for the first time in my life, I was strangely relaxed. So zen that my bridesmaids were totally freaked out by The New Me.
I suppose I figured, you get a day. The same amount of hours as any other. You have spent SO much time and energy planning, there is nothing you can do now but really just enjoy it.
And I did. It really honestly was the best day of my life.*
My wonderful hair and make-up artist made me feel beautiful. My amazing bride tribe came round looking spectacular and making me feel incredible. I had a great BTS video editor who captured every moment, from when we excitedly hid out on the top floor of the Astor Theatre during the MC intro and short films, to when I finally walked down the cinema aisle to cheers from friends and family to The Rolling Stones’ Sympathy for the Devil.
Just before heading out, I felt a quick pang. Was this actually happening? No last minute cancellation? No lock down? We’re right to go?
“It’s actually happening!” my bridesmaid said.
I know I had some sort of cool-girl moves planned for when I appeared, but as anyone who has done it knows, even as a somewhat extroverted person, it’s very confronting to see a cinema literally full of everyone you know who is there for you, staring at you! I excitedly waved at my fiancéeeeeeee (look, I don’t get to say it anymore, okay?) as my Mum/celebrant walked me down the aisle.
We got to do all the Basic Bitch things we’d been wanting to do for years. We did our vows. Maple was dressed to the nines as our beautiful big little ring bearer. We put on rings, said I do, and kissed. We got annoyed during photo hour and made a lot of mistakes people swore they didn’t notice.
We hopped in a minibus with our wedding party to our movie-themed reception at Glen Eira town hall, with tables named RUNAWAY BRIDE, THE HANGOVER and MEET THE PARENTS.
We danced the horas and got on chairs, we listened to funny and heart-warming speeches, we saw food come and go (didn’t have much ourselves) and excitedly greeted our guests. My husband (!) handed our peach schnapps, and I changed into an awesome party outfit. We sung, we danced, we laughed, and we lived and breathed and enjoyed every damn last second of it.
We felt lucky to have so many of our friends and family still here, to support us in a unity and celebration of love and happiness.
We had terrible hangovers, wrote thank you cards too late, went on a honeymoon with our English friends where we did absolutely nothing at all, and came back ready to face 2024 as a newly married couple.
There! I can write a happy one!
*I did also go to ERAs this year, so probably a 50/50 split.